Monday, 29 March 2010

I've got a feeling

I’m part of a fun little trio consisting of myself, my best friend (who I spoke about in the last post) and one other guy. We’ve never had a night out together that hasn’t been great. I’ve spent all day trying to think of one and I can’t.

For reasons unknown we haven’t been out together as a threesome in about a year and a half and this weekend we set about rectifying it with a trip to Preston.

Sometimes you can’t find the words to properly sum up how good a night was it would take too long and bore everyone and sometimes it’s because there actually aren’t the words to sum up, it’s more a feeling that you have so that when the night is long gone and you only have pictures left to look at, they bring back a feeling so strong it can knock you off your feet.

With these two people I am fully myself, I never feel like I’m trying to fit in to a role which has been provided to me (a pressure I accept I probably put myself under) and there’s no hidden agenda, I’m just with two of my most favourite people, forgetting about everything and everyone else for one night only.

At one point in the night I impressed upon them a very important point,

“Neither of you are allowed to get girlfriends you know”

(Could I please take a moment to point out that this was after the consumption of cocktails and good few gin and tonics.)

I did have a point behind my drunken statement.

Girls are rubbish. They complicate matters. They would most likely be distrustful of me, the person their boyfriends were going out and getting drunk with (“What the hell is she up to?”) and I can tell you now that I won’t like them because neither of those two boys are going to find a girlfriend that’s good enough for them and I’ll be the judge of who is good enough for them thank you very much. The girlfriends could come out with us but then the dynamic’s completely thrown off – it has to just be us three. And I don't know why it doesn't make a difference if I have a boyfriend, but it just doesn't (there's probably a more eloquent argument to make than that but at this point in time I can't wrap my brain around it).

So maybe that’s why these nights out are so good and why I look forward to them so much, because I dread, with a feeling that makes me feel completely sick to my stomach, the moment when one of them gets a girlfriend because I know that on some level it’ll spell the end of our trio as we know it.

Whether boys and girls can be friends will always be a bit of contentious topic and I guess that what we have is rare and maybe it only works because of a million different things happening at the same time, some kind of big bang theory for friendship, the situation has to be just right for it to work and just one thing has to go wrong for it all to be thrown off kilter.

So if it does all go wrong at some point in the future, and all I’m left with is that feeling of being with 2 people that I love and am completely happy with, then I’ll try and remain happy that I had a chance to have it at all...

...and then go back to constructing a mental list of why their girlfriend’s are stupid.


Flitterbee said...

Girls are not rubbish. I am a girl; you are a girl. Girls are not rubbish, and I dislike it when girls diss their own gender. said...

I understood what you meant! I agree in the sense that a lot of people, girls and boys included, think in a very conditioned and closed minded way! You are so right, if they had girlfriends, most likely the girlfriends would seethe with jealously at the thought of the boys going out with you. Why does sex always have to come into it! I personally, think it is a very special thing to have males as proper friends! I am not surprised that you dread it being changed! I think Flitterbee has misunderstood what you were trying to say! suzie xxx

Taz said...

I know what you mean hon, many a good friendship has been lost because the other partner felt threatened by the history, never mind the fact that there has never been nor ever would be anything but friendship there.
Here's to your boys finding girls like us, who get it ;)

mooncalf said...

It is one of life's great mysteries why our friends choose such unlikely romantic partners. Surely they're our friends and they should like people we like? When they find a partner we should be excited to meet this great person they've found.

Maybe we sometimes choose partners who complement us; who make up a good team. They're not enough like us for our friends to like them for the same reasons they like us.

Or maybe they just sometimes choose dreadful bores?

The Curious Cat said... will be okay, you can still go out together without the new girlfriends..and it may make things more fun - you never know! I think if it were me, I'd be scared of other females because being the only girl it would detract some of the attention away from myself but that is just me...and it has happened before but it is okay...things do change and alter...but I know what you mean...the status quo is good. It doesn't need any amendments/ PS If they are the right girls for these boys they won't get jealous as they'll feel just right and comfortable in their